Do Unto Others....

I had a very humbling and honest conversation the other day with my parents.  Due to context of the conversation, my Mother, in a light manner, was acting out how she would describe me to someone else.  While sticking to complimentary attributes, she started with saying that I was fun, knowing how to have a good time, nice, caring, and had a strong sense of what is correct.  Missing, however, was the expected "she is a really kind person and does a lot of good for others."  Now I’m not fishing for compliments, but I would have thought that my Mother, someone who i expected to know me very well and think highly of me would have said something along those lines.  I actually asked her about it and she said "Well, of course you are a kind person, but I don't see that you really go out of your way to involve yourself in acts of chesed (kindness)."  This sparked a whole, long further conversation where I, feeling a little hurt, probed both she and my Dad to get an honest opinion of what they thought of me as a person.

I have always tried to be nice to other people and the part of Judaism that I am most attracted to and feel to be most important is treating other people properly.  In my opinion properly includes respect, kindness, and without trying to sound cliché, in a manner in which I would like to be treated. There is certainly room for me to grow, but I was feeling pretty content with myself, that I had been holding myself to those standards.  While my parents didn't disagree, they helped me see that maybe I wasn't actively embodying that trait as much as I could be.  My mom pointed out that knowing the person I am, it isn't a question that if a situation crosses my path, I will approach it in a kind manner.  However, I am not making the choices on my own to seek out situations where kindness is needed and making myself available.  My father, as well, agreed that I could be making more of an active effort to seek out Chesed opportunities rather than waiting for them to cross me by.

While I had initially felt a little hurt that my own parents didn't see me as I had seen myself, I soon realized that this was an eye opening opportunity for me to really get feedback and possibly make a change.  It’s easy to start feeling comfortable with your actions and stop flirting with your comfort zone.  It’s hard to hear at first, but in truth I asked for - both figuratively and literally.  I’m hoping that I will have the strength and courage to start implementing a change and look for Chesed  opportunities in which I could be involved.

And on that note, I leave you with the following:
As if the timing couldn't have been more perfect, just after I had this conversation with my 'rents, my sister shared with my mom  the following link and she sent it my way  saying "So simply beautiful -what a meaningful life - Gavi not a dig, an example and inspiration!"  I found it to be incredible and I would like to share it with you - open your hearts!
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=464334032902